Memory-Triggers

FOR ME, ONE OF THE great memory-triggers, is music. I was more than a little obsessed with radio and music during the 1970s. It was an escape, yes, but also a vital link to a world outside my four walls. I remember loving the voice of Gilbert O'Sullivan and the sweet, upbeat tune he mastered for his hit, Alone Again (Naturally). The tune belied the lyrics.

In a little while from now

If I'm not feeling any less sour

I promise myself to treat myself

And visit a nearby tower

And climbing to the top

Will throw myself off 

In an effort to 

Make it clear to who ever

Wants to know what it's like

When you're shattered

Left standing in the lurch at a church

Where people saying, My God, that's tough

She stood him up

No point in us remaining

We may as well go home

As I did on my own

Alone again, naturally. 

To think that only yesterday

I was cheerful, bright and gay

Looking forward to who wouldn't do

The role I was about to play

But as if to knock me down

Reality came around

And without so much as a mere touch

Cut me into little pieces

Leaving me to doubt 

Talk about, God in His mercy

Oh, if he really does exist

Why did he desert me 

In my hour of need?

I truly am indeed 

Alone again, naturally

It seems to me that 

there are more hearts

Broken in the world 

that can't be mended

left unattended

What do we do? 

What do we do? 

Alone again, naturally

Looking back over the years

And whatever else that appears

I remember I cried when my father died

Never wishing to hide the tears

And at 65 years old, 

My mother, God rest her soul

Couldn't understand why the only man

She had ever loved had been taken

Leaving her to start 

With a heart so badly broken

Despite encouragement from me

No words were ever spoken

And when she passed away

I cried and cried all day,

Alone again, naturally. 

Although I've never been stood-up at the alter, I can understand the author's universal questions. Why God? So alone... devastated by humanity's insensitivies ..so ready to end it all... 

I'm not in that sad place now but I will never forget it. I suppose having been in the depths of despair helps me more appreciate my present mental health and happiness and goodness of humanity. 

How about you? Is there a song, or songs that remind you of sadder (or happier) times? 

Music and My Memoir

MY SON DANIEL IS A VERY smart young man. In his free time he's been buying broken Kindles and piecing them together to create like-brand new ones. Then he "roots" them and installs the Android operating system. The result, a fully functional touch-screen computer! This was my Christmas present. I know. My son rocks.

I am not a full-fledged techie. There is a lot I don't understand and when I hear words like the aforementioned "root" or "driver" or "sync" I glaze over. But I like my electronics. I like having my Kindle e-reader and my Amazon Cloud (music) Player. Thanks to my son, these apps are not only accessible from my laptop. The world exists on a 5x7 tablet. Who'd a thunk? 

When I wrote my memoir, I took advantage of all the memory-triggers I could think of. I spent hours at the library looking for books on various topics of my past. I Google-searched and Wikipedia-ed and Google Map-ed.  Many of my findings can be seen on my Pinterest pages. 

Music was one of the most emotional memory-triggers in my repertoire. I graduated high school in 1979 so the mid to late 1970s was my generation. I was addicted to KGON radio station and every time I got a paycheck I'd traipse over, sometimes with my gal pal Reva to For What It's Worth Records and buy an album. 

When I became a mom, I sold all my albums and changed roles. Throughout the 80s, 90s and part of the first decade of the new millennium I stayed in mother-mode. But when my kids grew up, I got introspective and started peeling back the layers. The bygone decades became important again. I bought CDs and would listen to them, tearfully pummeled back in time. I'd take notes on my surroundings and my emotions, seated in my bedroom, writing in my journal, Peter Frampton or Styx, or Boston lullabing me through the turbulence of my teen years. 

I'm so grateful to be alive in a time when, at least to some extent, the past is accessible. Do you have a favorite way to reconnect with the past? Favorite book, song, movie or TV show that connects you with those bygone days?